5 Things I Taught My Kid Today...

1. The proper ways in which to shoot spit balls from a straw. This didn't go so well at first since I accidentally shot him in the face and made him cry....thankfully I don't think anyone in in the packed restaurant noticed....

2. How to have the best evil laugh. I gave an example and made him laugh so hard he snorted. Best. Moment. Ever.

3. I, along with the help of the 1 millionth viewing of Toy Story 3, taught him the phrase " Holy moley guacamole!" Which comes out like " Rolly rolly rock and rolly!" Don't ask me how he changes it.

4. When one is hurt all it takes is some "smarshsmellows" to make it all better.

5. Mommy is a Princess. But when he found a crown at Cracker Barrel during lunch today he handed it to me and said " Here Mommy, try it on. Then you can be a Queen!" He's a fast learner that one.....


Here he is practicing his spit ball technique...