It's Thanksgiving Already?

I've had the pleasure of joining my neighbors or my "other family" for Thanksgiving on many occasion. They usually have a huge gathering every year and they never know just how many will be joining them. They're kind of rowdy :), but my cheeks usually end up hurting by the end of the day from all the laughing I've been doing. Blood or not...these people are family. When we lost Grandma earlier in the year, everyone mourned in their own way. Every event, big or small I've thought of her this past year. Thanksgiving was no exception. I found myself longing to hear the shuffle of her feet, or the little humming she would do that would at times drive you nuts. I saw her favorite coconut cake and wished I would find her just one more time sitting in her recliner eating a small bite, watching her great grandchildren playing around her. I have never missed her more. I have never missed shouting so loud I thought I might cave the roof in since that was the only way she could hear, and then her promptly respond with " you don't have to shout! I'm not deaf!". I miss walking in the house and being able to hear Jeopardy blaring from the back room. I miss watching old game shows with her and her telling me each time I came that there was never anything good on tv anymore. "All the soap operas on tv are just filthy these days. Garbage, nothing but garbage." I had to clip her toe nails once. I don't miss that :). She would have had a good time today watching all her babies and shuffling around. Whether we all said it or not we were all thinking the same thing: I wish Grandma was here. It's funny how many people you have coming in and out of your life, and how some people never leave. Grandma may not be with us in body any more, but she's with us in spirit..probably wagging that finger at us telling us to behave! " I'll try Grandma. I'll try."

Never a Dull Moment

You may think you lead an exciting life but try topping my afternoons. I go into work at the daycare center at noon usually, unless I'm needed to cover an earlier shift. All the kids are laying down for naps by this point and I'm in one room from 12-2 to give the women who've been there since 7 a lunch break. So I'm sittin there right, and all of a sudden about all 20 kids magically have to go the bathroom. Then we run out of toilet paper. Then kids are cryin because it's too cold. Finally peace and order is restored and naptime is offically in progress.I look up at one point and half the kids are sleeping with their butts in the air and half are either coughing or farting. It's true...every. single. word. I can't even make this stuff up yo. Kids are amazing. You have your senstive ones who cry at the drop of a hat. Then you have the ones that yell and kick or throw little tantrums. My favorite ones are the dramatic kind. I caught one kid in my class ( which is the afterschool class ranging from 5-12) literally dragging himself on his stomach across the gym floor saying " oooh my kneeee!" and then BAM 2 minutes later he's kicking a ball to another kid. It's amazing how that happens. I found one little girl slurping milk off the table. Another kid was dumping glitter in the glitter box and then I walked over to discover The Great Flood by the water fountain. I'm guessing it was the short ones who couldn't reach and decided that trying to throw water in the direction of their mouths seemed like a good idea. Someone wised up today though and I found a chair by the water fountain. I have grown to love each and every sigle one of those kids but boy can they wear you out. That being said I'm going to go wash away the glitter and glue stuck between my fingers and hopefully not dream of farting 3 year olds. God bless their little hearts.

" You Wanna Smell My Tootsiie Rolll? "

So I started a new job this week. Unbeknownst to me I'm teaching an after school class at the daycare my son attends. I didn't realize when I was hired that taking care of 23 rowdy children BY MYSELF, with no prior experience was what I was going to be doing. Not that I'm complaining....just venting. Which I'm allowed to do occasionally :). These are great kids with alot of potential. They are also great kids with an unfortunate hearing disabilty that is apparent everytime I talk. I brought a megaphone with me today in hopes that that would get them to listen. With this crowd I think I'm going to need an airhorn. I've never yelled so much in my life. They obviously have me confused as their doormat and personal maid because when I say "clean up after yourself", they hear " please leave your area as messy as possible then go on and play with something else leaving me to clean up after you." No ma'am, no beuno.
I will never in my life forget that first bus ride with them. I was on the smaller bus that picked up just a few kids everyday and as they're all talking, I distinctly heard a little girl in the back say to another little girl " you wanna smell my tootsiie rolll?" I just kept looking straight ahead and tried not to snort with laughter. Thankfully the little girl's comment to her friend can be easily explained in that it was Monday and the day before was Halloween. So every little boy and girl was just coming off of a weekend long sugar high and Tootsie Rolls and Reese's Peanut Butter Cups were still making appearences up and down the ailes of the bus. Lord help me.

By Wednesday I was getting pictures made for me and children whose names I still don't know were coming up to me and giving me hugs. So they like me....but don't listen to me. We can work on that though. It's clear that some of these kids don't come from good homes. That hugs and a simple " good job " are hardly ever heard, and most are starving for attention. So I got more then I bargained for when I was hired for this job. I thought I was just going to be babysitting with someone else. Despite the unexpectedness of having to plan crafts and help with homework and the constant 3 hours of yelling " Dont hit!" " Don't make me tell you again!", I've found myself in the unique position of making a difference in these kid's lives. I'm definitely being challeged, literally and figurtively but a challenge never killed anyone...it usually makes us stronger. I'm not going to lie though, I can't wait for the weekend.

" You can do sidebends or situps..."

I'm sitting on the couch with a q-tip in each ear. This is obviously not something that HAS to be shared but get a mental picture and have a good laugh. This year has been the worst year of my life for allergies and both the kid and I have suffered with itchy ears,runny noses and coughs for a better part of the year it seems. So because of the itchy ears, I will often walk around my house with q-tips sticking out of my head and pray to God the Zrytec kicks in soon. MOVING ON.

My child only hit one kid today! HA. I'm actually quite thankful for the decrease in numbers because another day of walking into daycare and hearing what an aggressive child I have would just be the icing on the cake. I still had to take away his library privledges for the day but I think I'm getting closer to having a non violent 2 year old.

Favorite moment of the day? Kenny grabbing my face and kissing me repeatedly then yelling " HIGH FIVE!" while throwing his hand up in the air. I laughed so hard which only encouraged his jumping enthusiastically on the couch even more. Then he started dancing and doing a shimmy with his shoulders....I about fell off the couch from laughing. Then immediately wondered what they were listening to at his daycare and which little girl to thank for teaching my son the shimmy....or whatever it's called. I swear I walked in to pick him up from daycare one day and heard " Baby Got Back playing in the background...like a kids version. WTF. Because really...I could think of about a gazillion different songs that are actually appropriate for 2 YEAR OLDS then a sexually explicit song like "Baby Got Back". Let's not get me started. Peace out yo.

"This too shall pass"

Kenny has entered a new stage of The Two's and this stage is not so easily dealt with like it was in the beginning. His daily routine changed a few months ago due to some setbacks in my life and I slowly began to see some changes in him. His attitudes began to get worse, and he began to act out at every opportunity. The teachers at his daycare for example, started telling me more frequently that he was hitting other children and not responding to their methods of discipline ( which is basically none btw ). Well, hitting his friends has escalated to hitting children he doesn't even know. He whacked a little girl at church this morning across the face with a bag of grapes and I about lost my mind. Yes, the child is two. Yes, this is a normal stage ( so I've been told ) and " this too shall pass". Well, as I told my friend today, he better pass it soon because he won't have much of a butt left if he doesn't. Parenting is one of the hardest, if not THE hardest job anyone can ever take on. Single parenting is even harder. Because while I try my best to instill all aspects of discipline, love, firmness and all that good stuff, there are some things that I can't handle like a daddy can. All Kenny's dad has to do is look at him and he stops whatever he is doing. But when he's with me it's the complete opposite. I say up, Kenny says down. I say stop and he keeps doing it. I spank him and it's like it doesn't even phase him. What the heck dude? I guess I now understand when my parents said " just wait till you have a child of your own....then you'll understand." Yeah...I understand alright. I understand the importance of nap times, earplugs and chocolate. Oddly enough, after battling the will of my little hooligan all day and hearing nothing but " Mommmmmy juuuuuice! * pout * or " Mommmmmy watch teeeeeeeeeeeveeeeeeeeeee" * POUT* he was a joy 30 min before bedtime and we had a great time tickling and being silly. It's the 30 minutes of joy that help make the 23.5 hours of strongwills and whining bearable. Children are a blessing, and moments with them are fleeting. Pretty soon he won't want to have anything to do with me or tickling my belly button.....so I guess I better suck it up and take the good with the bad. It's just one of those days I guess....nothing that some chocolate and Detective Stabler won't cure...Law and Order here I come.

Have Kids? Traveling? Buy Earplugs...

What possessed me to drive a total of 1000 miles with a baby in the back seat is beyond me. Actually I do know. I haven't seen some of my family members in over 10 years so given the recent events in my life I have some more time on my hands. I decided to drive the long 10 hour drive to Memphis and I had it all figured out. I went to the Dollar Tree and Walmart and stocked up on little things I knew would keep my son occupied and loaded up on snacks and other various things. The ride there wasn't so bad. And to make a long story short, while it was nice to see family I won't be taking a trip like that with a 2 yr old EVER again. Especially by myself. The way back went something like this: " Kenny no!", " Don't bite yourself!", "Don't rip that!" " No you may not have fries at 7 in the morning". I have never in my entire adult life been more excited to be back from a trip just for the simple fact of not having to listen to " Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mamaa, Mamaa, Maamaaa!!" while being confined to the car. Ever seen that episode of Family Guy with Stewie buggin his Mom? I don't watch it much but here's how I felt...



So here are some important tips for anyone traveling alone with a 2 year old or any child under the age of 5. And I'm not sure why I picked the age 5...it just seems that at 5 the kid should be able to entertain themselves better then when they're younger. Maaaybe not :).

1. If you have cruise control, use it. This helps significantly in being able to reach objects your child is screaming for. Yes I realize it's dangerous and you have to be able to multi-task like driving a car with one hand while half your body is in the back seat.

2. If you have a boy, duct tape is essential. And noo not to shut them up ( although I thought about it :) ) But it provides a quiet ride for many miles just from the mere fascination of it.

3. SNACKS. I cannot emphasize this enough. Get whatever your kid likes and get plenty of it. Just start throwing food at them if you have too. If they don't eat it then chances are they'll find a way to reach it later.

4. Don't normally do fast food? Well make an exception. I don't care that my son only eats the french fries. For 20 glorious minutes he's too busy stuffing his face to make a noise.

5. Remember to breathe as you turn around and find your child ripping paper to shreds or that new coloring book you just spent over $5 on. And since when are coloring books $5?! Geez.

6. The rule of " If it's too quiet be concerned" applies to car rides as well. No environment is safe!!

That being said, try to enjoy the ride as much as possible. :). I love traveling and Kenny is a great traveler under normal traveling conditions like to Gramma's house. But any car ride over 5 hours with a baby is too much for one person to handle. We did have fun all in all though. But next time, I'm totally flying..... and packing Benedryl. Don't judge me...if you had kids you'd think it too :P .

Me and the kid at Graceland. Not Much of an Elvis fan but I must say it was pretty cool :),

And To Think I Wanted a Girl...

I seriously cannot picture my life without a little boy running amuck in it. Dressing up little girls in frilly clothes and having tea parties would be fun, but I'll take my mud slingin, bug lovin boy. I have so much fun with that kid I don't know what I did before. I mean, obviously I remember what I did before, but it was so dull compared to pretending to be dinosaurs and tigers in the middle of the afternoon.

I couldn't stand sitting in the house this past weekend so I threw the kid in the car and we headed down south. Made it to Savannah and realized 5 minutes of being outside that I had greatly misread the weather for the weekend. I have never, in my entire adult life been so hot. I think I sweated my makeup off within the first 10 minutes. And seeing as the streets there are cobblestone...well...that made for a reeeally fun trip in the stroller. We were there for maybe an hour and I knew we had to do something other then walk around in the heat. And that's when I saw the giant tour boat. The words" Do you want to ride on the big boat?" had barely left my mouth when Kenny started jumping up and down and saying " big boat!" over and over again. Thankfully he's still free so it was fairly cheap to ride. Needless to say that was the big highlight for him :)





So that was Saturday and Sunday we had an ice cream party to go to next door. And on our short little walk back home Kenny kept saying " Cheese! Mommy cheese! I've never been more confused. Any parent will tell you that trying to decipher a two year olds language can be tricky but this was just weird. He seemed very insistent on going back and getting cheese. It wasn't until we made it to our door and couldn't get in that I realized I left my keys. It took me to the other trip back to realize that's what he had been trying to tell me. My two year old, who spits on the floor and makes monkey sounds in the grocery store knew I had left my keys. At least one of us remembered. :)

A Silly Little Dinosaur

I have a silly little Dinosaur running all about
A silly little Dinosaur who loves to scream and shout!
From morning until night
He causes quite a fright!
Destroying things here and there
Slinging mud into the air!
But even though with all that noise
He still manages to pick up his toys.
Good Lord knows he may be loud
But this little Dinosaur is never to proud
To say "please" and "thank you"
And clean up his mess
And come breakfast, lunch, or dinner
His food he will always bless.
He may at times be whiny
And sometimes a little fierce
And Heaven help us more then once
An eardrum he has pierced.
But everyday it's worth it
I could not ask for more
Because there's nothing better then a kiss
From my silly little Dinosaur.



An Original by Me 7-19-2010

An Ode to Papa

In order for the few that might actually read this that don't know who I'm talking about I feel the need to explain a few things. My mother is best friends with Steve and Carol. Steve has been a very influential part of my life and is like my other father. When my family was young we lived with them and their three kids before we moved to a new town. So the four children that I mention is including me. I just add myself to their family all the time :). Well every morning we would all wake up and when Steve would leave for work we would race to the front door to watch him go by on his motorcycle. Even their dog would race to the door to say bye. It just so happens that I now live right next to them and my son knows Steve as Papa. Every morning before we leave, we listen and wait for Papa to go by on his bike. And it hit me the other day that some things never change......Papa may have less hair...but most things have stayed the same ;). And while I may not have gotten the morning routine right... that wasn't really the point! That being said, please enjoy An Ode to Papa.


Once upon a time
In a land not so far away
Lived four little children
And every single day
They'd wake up so early
That the sun was not shining
They'd eat all of their breakfast
(There might have been some whining!)
And then they'd hear his footsteps rattling the stairs
"Daddy's leaving!" they'd all cry
And would jump from their chairs
To make sure that each one gave him a big hug and a kiss
Because Daddy was leaving
He sure would be missed!
Then they'd wait oh so patiently
Till they heard that great roar
And then they'd all race to be first at the door
To see their proud Daddy go by on his bike
He'd wave to each one
It was really quite a sight!
Who knew that 20 years later
With a house of my own
Me and a kid would stand there alone
And wait oh so patiently to hear that great roar
Now we both race to be first at the door.
We eagerly wait for Papa to go by
He waves to us both
It's really quite a sight. :)

Love you Papa,

Sarah and Kenny

Hurry Up Friday. I'm Over This Week.

The next time I pray I'm going to ask God for more hours in the day so I might have a chance in getting some things done. I felt as if I were failing in life today. Kenny woke up...or shall I say GOT up before I did this morning and prances in my room to get me up. 10 minutes later he was in his room for being ugly and it progressively got more difficult to do anything with him. I miss the mornings (which were not that long ago ) where I had almost an hour just to myself to wake up, shower, and get ready for the day. But for the last two mornings, no matter what time I put him to bed he's up at the crack of dawn. Boo. So I had 1 unhappy child for most of the morning, along with a kitchen floor that I wouldn't let a dog eat off of, carpet that hadn't been vacuumed since sometime last week, and clothes strewn about as if closets didn't exist. And of course, NO TIME to take care of it. I hate leaving my house dirty.....because I really hate coming home to it dirty. Everything just seemed to be in complete chaos this morning and it was just too much. I made it out the door on time and cried most of the way to work. It wasn't just the fact that my house was dirty and nothing seemed to be going right, but there are just some mornings where I feel every ounce the single mother I am. I hope that made sense. I'm too tired to really care though :). I'm certainly not complaining. There are single mother's out there who have it worse then I do. And I am very much aware of how blessed I am. But I woke up and didn't want to do this alone anymore. And I don't mean "alone " in the sense of not having ANY support. My family is simply amazing and I have the best group of friends. Ever. But I don't think I really need to explain the kind of alone I mean :). Hopefully the day is coming where what will change. Until then, it's just me, a kid, and the chaos that is my house.

The Battle of The Two's

I got home at 6:00 pm last night. Kenny threw fits from 6:05 till bedtime which was at 9. Usually it's 7:30 but he was so busy pushing my buttons dinner was pushed back an hour and a half. I did remarkably well by keeping my patience. It wasn't untill bedtime that I started to crack. EVERYTHING was a fight. Whether it was brushing his teeth or which book to read, nothing made him happy. I must have repeated myself over 100 times last night trying to get him to either say yes ma'am or please or just simply obey. I thought I was going to lose it. Somehow I got him into bed and I prayed he would wake up a happier child. I've learned that staying calm is extremely important. You don't want them to see you're about to crack because then it just gives them more reasons to push your buttons till they win. I've learned to do some things to keep calm. 1: WALK AWAY. If you want your child to live to see his or her next birthday...just walk away till you can rationally think. 2: Eat lots of chocolate. 3: Invest in some earplugs. And when those things fail.....pack up their bags and send em to the neighbors :). Kidding. I've only done 2 of those things and for those who know me well enough they can probably guess them. So last night was my first glimpse of the The Two's. I'm still not going to say the terrible two's but "trying" is most certainly not the right description for what I encountered last night. So after three hours of fighting The Two's I came out on the other side tired, bald, but victorious.

Who's Yer Daddy?

Kenny and I were at the store one day recently getting some necessities and I always make him help me. This helps the whole grocery shopping experience and he loves feeling like he's contributing. So he's sitting in the cart taking all the things I give him and arranging them just so and anytime we pass a lady he'll point and say " Mommy", to which I'll reply " Yes, that probably is someone's Mommy". But lately he's taking a liking to pointing and calling every male he sees Daddy. It will often evoke chuckles from the men passing by but it always embarresses me. Naturally I correct him and tell him that that's not his daddy but he continues to do it anyways. Well, it was all fun and games till the black gentleman behind us in the check out line. He was at least 50 something, and looked like he had a rough life. Anyways, Kenny was helping me put everything up on the counter when he stopped, turned to the man, pointed and loudly exclaimed " DADDY!" The man's eyes got big, and his head immediately went down, and I immediately turned every shade of red you could think of. I think I mumbled an apology while throwing bags as fast as I could in the cart. It's better then the time my friend's daughter decided to take off her clothes in the middle of McDonalds and streak. But I have a feeling Kenny's not far off. Kids.

Bring on the Two's....

It was early Sunday morning on 5/18/08 at exactly 5:59 am, that I became the mother to the cutest baby on the face of this earth. It was love at first sight :). It also was the day I had a deep appreciation for the drug vicodin....I think that's what they gave me. I had a c-section and my epideral wore off after they stiched me back up, and buddy... lemme tell yah,I felt EVERYTHING. My fiance at the time said he found where I was cause he heard me screaming bloody murder down the hallway. It was awful. But it was completely worth it in the end because of this ..
He still gives me this look :).
Many people have already commented on how I'm now entering the "terrible twos". And yes, I'm sure there will be days but I'm going to try and approach it as the "trying twos". We had a great start to them though! First, I took him to Edventure which is like a ginormous playground. It's a museum technically but it has so many cool things you forget it's educational. They had a mini store just for kids where they could get their own shopping cart and go up and down the ailes getting food. They even had a cash register and I just happened to notice the WIC button. Because it's never too early to teach your child about government assistance ( that was sarcasm just in case you missed it). We later had a celebratory dinner at Mcdonald's and I throughly enjoyed him inhaling his burger... Add a few gifts and a cupcake and I call that a birthday success. I'm throwing a party for him on Saturday but yesterday was just about me and him. I never believed the other parents when they said " enjoy them at this age because they grow up so fast!". Unfortunately I think it's true. I know I'll wake up one day and realize I have a teenager in the house but for now I'll enjoy this...
and this....

"Never Smile at a Crocodile"...

You know what really irritates me? Men who think that a flashy car and a pastel shirt is going to impress someone. Not to mention an ego the size of Texas. You know what irritates me even more? Guys who make jokes that a 12 year old boy would make WHILE at someones work. It's really only funny to you moron. I'm just trying to do my job. Let me explain so it makes sense a little. First, I work with 4 guys. That in and of itself should be the first clue to my story. They are all nice guys, but one in particular has a few friends who like to call the office and ask for him but they give out famous golfer names, or football player names, or serial killer names. Names that someone like myself have no clue about. But then they sometimes say their names are "Seymour...Seymour Butts" or other names with different parts of the body....use your imagination. So when they call and ask for my co-worker I'll let him know they're on the phone and when I repeat the name it is often followed by bursts of laughter or "really Sarah? You know who such and such is right?" Well no as a matter of fact I don't. I was too busy raising a kid to notice or care. Yes, indeed, these names are often creative and quite funny when you say them out loud and don't realize what you're saying. But then there are days when it's not funny and it just makes the person look and feel like a complete idiot. Today would be that day. Normally I just deal with it on the phone....today my co-worker's friend actually came in the office. And since I'm just a temp who's been there for maybe two months, I don't know what his friends look like. He comes in with his aviator sunglasses on, wearing a pastel yellow shirt and it was miracle his ego made it through the door. I immediately wanted to vomit. Spare me. So he asks for his friend, gives me his name which he said was Jason something or other and when I page his friend and say who's up front for him he starts laughing. Blah blah blah....it ended up his friend gave me the name of Jason from all those serial killer movies. But since I have never in my life seen one I had no idea who he was claiming to be and neither did I care. And I made sure to tell him so. Which took all the fun out of his little joke. Boo freakin hoo. Why this incident irritates me so much I don't know. I think it's mainly because unlike what you may think from this rant, I really do love to joke around and have a good time. Being able to joke around at work is even better. But I don't like being taken advantage of, and I don't appreciate it when you make a joke at someone else's expense, especially when they're just trying to do their job. I'm mainly just irritable and want to eat all the chocolate in sight. Which explains alot. SO.....sorry for rambling,and there's nothing wrong with aviator sunglasses and corvettes. I do, however, have a strong distaste for men in pastel shirts. But I'll try to make the next post more interesting and less like a hormonal rant. Goodnight.

Everyone Poops...

And my son just happens to poop in the middle of the floor. At nap time yesterday he took his diaper off, popped a squat and pooped in the middle of his room. It's at least better then the times he would take off his diaper and paint with it. Now if I can just get him to call me when he has to go then we'd be in good shape.

This week has been exhausting, and I'm not sure what was worse...spending 5 days with golf obsessed, insensitive male coworkers or the weekend with a kid who threw fits whenever possible. And I love my son, but this weekend was rough. And I say insensitive coworkers but that's not completely true. Actually they are all pretty good guys, it's just sometimes the level of testosterone is so great that it spills over to the two hormone producing people there and it clashes. It's a tale as old as time. A song as old as rhyme. I know you're dying to break out in song right now. So anyways...the weekend had it's bright spots. Got to spend some time with my twin...we're not actually related but we might as well be. I'll post a pic and you'll see why I call her my twin. It's scary. We went to see Taylor Swift on Friday and I got to experience what an entire arena filled with little girls sounds like screaming like banshees. It was an experience. One that my ears are sure to remember for years to come. But it really was a good time, and Taylor even made an appearance in our section. She puts on a good show...minus all the hair tossing. But if I had that much hair I guess I'd fling and toss it too.





Me and the twin before the concert.....told yah we look alot alike!

And when he wasn't throwing tantrums the kid was a pretty sweet boy. Here he is licking the pot after a batch of fudge I made. And just in case you've never seen it, a pic of a male doing the dishes. I honestly didn't have to coach him at all in doing this. He put on the gloves and said he wanted to wash the dishes. It was great. Let's hope this lasts for many, many, MANY years to come ;).



Did you know that "Everyone Poops" is actually a book? So if your scared to approach your kids or any child about this natural process ...they made a book to ease the discomfort of it...bahahaa. I'm not lying...check it out at Everyone Poops

"By The Beard of Zeus!"

"I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany." OMG.....I looooooove Will Ferrell. I can't tell you how many times I've seen Night of the Roxbury, or Anchorman, and The Ballad of Ricky Bobby....genius, pure genius.

Ok, so it's Monday again. And Monday's can go either way. I woke up without enough sleep but still ready to start my day. The kid woke up happy which is a miracle considering alot of mornings start off with screaming and gnashing of teeth. Everything was going swimmingly. I decided to wear a cute little dress I've had in my closet for my non bloated days and I was workin it. I was having one of those rare days where my hair and make-up was glorious,I had some killer shoes for my dress and I felt great. Get in the car, rollin down the road and I don't even get half a mile before I realize there was a reason I wasn't originally going to wear a dress today. I didn't shave. "Good Morning, this is Sarah, how can I help you shave...I mean SAVE on some insurance today?" I wanted so badly to turn around and go back to change but I was already running late. I was mortified at the thought of my chewbacca legs being the topic for discussion all day with the four guys in the office. They weren't THAT hairy but it was noticeable. I managed to avoid most of them and stayed at my desk most of the day. I did catch one of them looking down and I had to bite my tongue to keep from screaming "YES I FORGOT TO SHAVE TODAY!" Oh well....at least I remembered deodorant. But the highlight of my day was when Kenny and I got home and he picked me some flowers :), and being the sentimental mother I am I'll probably keep them until he's 40...or forever.

What a sweetheart!!

This is him having free reign of the house. Why yes, that is a vacuum hose in his mouth....no, I don't know why. I just take pictures to laugh at hysterically and ones he will be sure to hate me for later in life.

My Little Inmate

So at 4:30 this morning I bolted out of bed still mostly unconscious. I was completely conscious though, of the fact that I heard someone rattling a door knob. It took me all of 3 seconds to realize that Kenny had escaped his crib and was trying unsuccessfully to escape his room. He did, however, successfully lock himself in. Thankfully our door knobs are designed where he can lock them from one side and I can stick a key in on my end and unlock them. Which at 4:30 in the morning was a really good thing because I really didn't want to figure out how to get him out otherwise. So I open the door and there is my son, looking up at me with that disgustingly cute smile of his and all he says is "Hii!". He obviously does not fully comprehend the importance of sleep and not getting up out of bed at the unconstitutional hour of 4:30. It was hard to be even the slightest bit upset that he was standing there though because he was just too cute. So I explained that it was still night night time and threw him back in bed with a smooch. As I began to close his door I realized I still had my keys I used to unlock his door in my hand, which made me feel completely like a warden of a jail. I know that sounds crazy but at that hour it seemed completely rational. Just go with it. Then I realized my house is made of stone,so it isn't TOO far fetched for me to compare my house to saay...Alcatraz,aka The Rock. All I need now is a moat around my house or a big body of water and I'm set. I just hope I don't find him tunneling his way out in the middle of the night tonight. Haahaa.

The Joy of a Picky Eater

I never thought I would have the child that would make faces at his vegetables, spit out his food or would mash beans in between his fingers. And yes, "mash" is a word....at least in the South :). This child used to eat like a horse. Anything you would put in front of him would inevitably go into his mouth. But then the Eat Like a Horse phase vanished and in it's place I got the You Can't Possibly Expect Me to Eat That phase. I would get soooo frustrated when he refused to eat that I would sit there for over an hour trying to get him to. Nothing I tried would get him to eat. So finally I just gave up. It wasn't worth the time or energy to force him to eat something he didn't want to eat. The kid isn't going to starve to death. I finally decided that if he's hungry enough he'll eat what I give him. I would at least make him try it. But 9 times out of 10 it would get spit out. I'm sure I'm not the first parent to dread dinner time for this sole reason. Nothing is more discouraging sometimes then to come home after a long day, fix dinner, only for it to be spit out or frowned at. Whatev. But tonight was a different story. For some unknown, unexplainable reason.....Kenny ate his food. The massive amounts of tater tots on his plate helped. Ok, maybe not MASSIVE amounts....but a sizable portion. Because seriously....who doesn't like tater tots? He even shoved some peas into his mouth after I promised him more tater tots. So given the fact that he had noodles as his main course, followed by a handful (or possibly two) of peas, and a heaping portion of tater tots, I can rest easy tonight knowing that I actually did feed my child and know for a fact that he won't starve to death in his sleep.

"When Yah Gotta Go, You Gotta Go!"

Monday as you will remember, started off with vomit. Tuesday started off with poop all over the crib, and ended on a sad note with a sweet old lady going to be with Jesus. Grandma Polly made everyone call her Grandma, because everyone who walked through her door she saw as family. She was fiesty and often said inappropriate things but didn't care. She always had cookies to hand out, stories to tell and loved a good party. If you came back from shopping she'd always ask you " Buy me anything good?". She moved her furniture around daily, and she always asked for help at the most inopportune times. But we did it....with smiles on our faces. She did this up until a month before she died. She was 88. She was practically if not most certainly deaf, but would never admit it. In order for her to hear you you would have to scream in her ear, which in my case, almost always invoked the teasing from the others around me since I screamed the loudest (it's a gift). She would always let you know if your shirt was too tight, or your pants were too low...and since she couldn't hear she'd yell it. So EVERYONE knew if she thought your shirt was too tight or your pants were too low. And if anything was hanging out....well...you were done for. If you brought her food that you made and she didn't like it she'd give it to the cat. She's been such a special part of our lives, and it's going to take some getting used to to not having her here. But no matter how hard it is to say goodbye,I just keep thinking that we should all be so lucky. She died holding the hands of the ones she loved. She lived long enough to see 43 grandchildren come into this world, and she made everyone she met feel special. And I wouldn't be in the least surprised if somewhere up in Heaven, right now, she was moving furniture around. My guess is, is that she has alot more helpers now. Kenny and I miss you Grandma Polly. We wish you could have stayed with us longer but as you so eloquently used to say, " When yah gotta go, you gotta go!"

A Bad Case of The Mondays

First off, Office Space is just brilliant, and I still want a red swingline stapler. If you have no idea what I'm talking about then you have to rent the movie. Soooo today started off with vomit. Nice, smelly, chunky vomit. I can handle just about anything this child has come with. A smelly diaper, a runny smelly diaper, being pooped and peed on.But I don't want to see, hear and especially smell vomit. Who does? But you do whatcha gotta do and you do it out of love. This poor child just can't seem to catch a break though. If it's not ear infections it's teething and since January he has battled something. I walk in his room to get him dressed and ready for daycare and the back of his head was just covered, along with every blanket and toy. I have no idea when it happened since he didn't make a peep all night. And he seemed happy enough. So I threw him in the bath, decided it might be a good idea to skip breakfast and managed to still get out the door mostly on time. I would have gladly stayed home with him but he wasn't running a fever and he acted like nothing had happened. I just wanted to put that in there so it doesn't seem like I'm contaminating every child in day care on purpose. Thankfully he got a good report today and I was told he was relatively happy. I managed to get to work with just 4 minutes to spare and it literally felt like I blinked and it was over. I work in insurance for the time being (it's a temp job)and the highlight of my day was when I get a call asking where our office is located. Anyone who knows me knows I can't give directions to save my life. That's why God invented gps. So I pass the woman to someone more capable of getting her there. Come to find out, the woman called from her car...which was sitting in our parking lot. Right next to the HUGE sign with our logo and name of the agent. Not to mention the sign on the door. Oh..and the company truck parked right next to her with a ginormous State Farm sticker. How she did not know that she was sitting in our parking lot is beyond me. She said she was confused because she thought for sure it was on the right side of the road, and we're on the left. I had to control my laughter as she walked in the door. She laughed it off and we tried to tell her not to worry....it happens all the time.

I'm hoping the rest of the week will fly by like today did. I'm also hoping I don't wake up to any more smelly surprises and with a happy healthy kid!

all snuggled up on the couch with mommy's favorite blanket :)

French Toast Saturdays...

I got to lay in bed till 8 am today. It was glorious. I can't believe that that is considered late for me now. I fondly think back to the days when sleeping in was till at least 2 in the afternoon. I don't think I could do that even if I tried now! Too much to do!! So Saturdays for Kenny and I are called French Toast Saturdays and he gets quite excited. By 9:30 we were already outside and making mud and weed soup with a splash of clover and rocks. Which was, of course, a bad idea because any mention of food the kid's going to stick it in his mouth. But let's be honest...he probably would have anyways. We'll just think of it as an extra dose of fiber. I managed to get some parts of my house clean and Kenny managed to destroy the rest. So all in all it was a great morning. Then naptime came and went.....with no naps. Two hours was spent putting him back in bed because he kept climbing out to play. I don't mind so much when he climbs out of his crib in the morning and plays quietly till I get up. What I do mind is having to repeat myself like a parrot and tell him to stay in bed which obviously didn't work out very well. I just want the kid to obey. I managed to keep myself relatively calm although I was DYING to have a nap. As any mother will tell you, naptime is sacred. It is something that is cherished and sometimes greatly needed. And I'm not going to lie...I got cranky cause I didn't get one. But mostly I was just discouraged. It seems that lately it doesn't matter how I discipline him or handle his little outbursts. So I finally gave up getting him to sleep because I didn't know what else to do. I got tired of getting up and down but then when I just gave up and let him play I felt guilty for giving in. ARGH. Then, when we finally get out of the house to get a few errands done he passes out in his carseat.....snoring. I wanted to scream. I got over it eventually and ended up at the mall playing on those little ride things which I refuse to put quarters in. He doesn't know the difference and as far as I'm concerned he doesn't need to :). I think now it's time for some hot tea and what better be a good movie! Goodnight!

The Meaning Behind It All

I know some of my friends will probably think that this is a really gross name for a blog but I have my reasons! I guess first I should say that I am a Princess. It's a title many will disagree with but that's ok. I know who I am and one day I'll convince the world of it. That's not to say I'm spoiled brat though. I grew up with Salvation Army clothes and my mother was/ is a yard sale fanatic. I mean shopper. Moving on, When Kenny was first born I was so freaked out at having a baby, and like many new parents, felt completely helpless as to what exactly I was supposed to be doing. My world as I knew it was gone, and in it's place was this little boy who was completely dependent on me. So when I brought him home that very first day... he peed on me. And within a millisecond I was thinking "so this is my life now" which was then followed by " MOM!!OMG HE'S PEEING ON ME!!" It was like he initiated me to the new mommy club. And basically the insanity hasn't stopped since. He hasn't peed on me since that first day...now he just paints the walls with his poo whenever the mood strikes him. So I named my blog The Princess and the Pee because of the obvious, but I thought it was a funny way to describe my life. While it was once made up of parties after work and laying out by the pool it now consists of feeding, cleaning, and watching the most adorable creature on this earth grow up. And I wouldn't have it any other way.